Healing Wounds
by gossamer moonglow
Summary: After Tim's departure Gibbs remembers and tries to find him and get him back. It followes Broken Trust  see my author profile for more information  Gibbs/Tim slash.
1. Chapter 1

It starts just after _**Broken Trust**_

Chapter 1

Jethro stormed back into the office refusing to look at anyone, and at the same time daring them to speak to him; was that the best way to put the blame on someone else for his own mistakes? Well, when it comes to Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs, there has to be someone else to take the blame. Even in things he is responsible about. Of course, his co-workers knew better that so they kept he mouths shut. Well, all, except for one.

'We need to talk, Jethro'

'About what?' That was when the doctor saw his friend's hand.

'What happened to your hand?' Ducky asked worried.

Bloody spots were forming around the knuckles. Jethro stared his hand as well, like seeing it for the first time and wondering why there was blood on it.

'Come with me.' He doctor would have never believed he 'd ever be capable of dragging the mighty L.J. Gibbs with him like that, but apparently one of his agent's resignation was the way to reduce Jethro's legendry strength. Ducky shook his head. By all heavens, he was right; there was something more between Jethro and Timothy? But what was it? He had noticed it about half a year ago with that case of the dead homosexual Petty Officer, or was it a captain? Anyway in that case the both of them had to go undercover for evidence. After the case was solved, Tim and kept his distance and by that, he didn't let his boss invading his personal space as he did before, he was always a step behind or to the next, little things that no one- except Ducky- had noticed. And that continued for more than a month; after that Tim little by little accepted Jethro's invasions with less hesitation. The blushing or his shy glances towards his Boss had gone unnoticed by their co-workers, but not by the see-it-all doctor. And really, Jethro's behaviour had changed as well, closer to the man before the revelation about his first wife and daughter; his eyes were piercing when he stared at his youngest agent. Was it possible?

But Ducky, had also noticed Tim's earlier cold look directed at Jethro and… was it Abby?

'What did you do, Jethro?' Lost in his thoughts, the taller man looked at him surprised and while Ducky wanted to explore that feeling as well, he pointed to the agent's right hand.

'To your hand.' At the same moment he took it in his own hands to bandage it.

'I hit the wall' was the startling answer.

'And what did you do to Timothy?' His patient sighed deeply.

'Nothing, he could know about.' He couldn't now, could he? Guilt and anger warred inside him; guilt because of what he had done and anger towards Tim, because even though he didn't know, he had left them, he had left him for more money; it was as if Jethro didn't matter to him at all. Their relationship was nothing special. 'I need to leave, Duck.' He had to talk with Leon.

'Jethro we need to talk,'

'What about?'

'Timothy,' Jethro stared at Ducky and the older man's suspicions were affirmed. He now knew whatever had happened to Timothy, his friend had played an important role. Jethro sighed in defeat.

'My place , 21.00 hours. And bring dinner.' Suddenly Gibbs stood up and marched to the Director's Office. The secretary tried to stop him, but hey this is Gibbs we're talking about. For some reason, everything's forgiven; unless it's Tim he has done something to. Vance looked up from the papers he was reading. After all he was expecting him.

'Jethro, what can I do for you?'

'You said McGee was going to stay here until we could find someone to replace him.' Which Gibbs knew for fact they wouldn't.

'Yes, well, actually he offered to stay, but he was in sick leave either way, so there was no need to keep him here. After all he couldn't work on the field and the doctor said he had to rest. So…' OK something wasn't binding well.

'Sick leave, Leon?'

'Yes because of the accident with his car. Actually it was a miracle he survived after seeing the car's predicament.' Jethro's blood turned cold. Why hadn't Tim called him?

'How? When did it happen?' He said sitting down in the chair in front of Leon's desk.

"On Friday….'

'In LA?'

'No, here! Not so far from your part of town, about an hour or so. Didn't McGee call you?' Well, wasn't it obvious that he hadn't?

'Tim… McGee wasn't here of Friday, Leon, he was in LA, wasn't he?'

Vance looked at his distraught agent and couldn't understand the reason behind his worrying. OK, yes, Gibbs team was like a family, one trusting the other with his life so it was only expectable stronger bonds to be created, but what he was seeing at the moment, was guilt written all over Gibbs' face and there was no reason at all for that. In all truth, the man before him wasn't the well known stoic L.J Gibbs. All of the sudden all emotions had been wiped from his face and the Director wondered if it was in his mind in the first place or if Jethro was faking the calmness. Either way, there was nothing he could do. Taking a better look at Jethro, he noticed the bandages.

'What happened to your hand?'

'Nothing. Thanks, Leon.' And he left the Director's office more or less in the same way he had barged in.

Jethro had to locate Tim and find out what had caused his sudden decision, even thought he did have a sneaking suspicion, he chose not to dwell upon it. A new case held him back and he lost the chance to find Tim on time.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The case was a difficult one and they had absolutely no evidence to work with. All information about their suspect was private, secured by other agencies, namely CIA, that weren't exactly open at giving information. Gibbs wasn't to be deterred though by this kind of plain inconveniencies.

'But, Boss, we can't do it. We cannot hack in another agency's files.' Tone tried to reason with Jethro but for answer he got a raised eyebrow.

'And how were we doing it so far, DiNozzo?' Tony was not going to reply to that! It would have been like digging his grave with his own hands. Ziva, on the other hand, who was just standing near Tony didn't participate in DiNozzo's attempt at escape with as minimum casualties as possible.

'We weren't doing it, Gibbs. McGee was doing it. And as you can see he's not here at the moment.' A thunder passed by Gibbs eyes and even Ziva took a step behind; she didn't actually expect that. He moved slowly towering over her and whispered to both of them.

'You think I haven't noticed he's not here? Well, I have, but his work must be done by one of you! Or you can't handle it?'

'Gibbs, I can't even do it. That's Timmy's land of expertise. Even I can't do it… and I'm much more… savvy with computers that Tony and Ziva' Abby happened to be around there and listened to Gibbs' order. He left Ziva and moved towards her, in a lot different manner he had done three days ago.

'I want it to be done. I don't care how or who's going to succeed it, I want it done. The sooner the better!'

Needless to be said it wasn't done at all, and they had to follow a far stricter and, by the book way, to find the so needed evidence. By the time they closed the case Jethro was tired, angry –furious actually-, drained and lonely.

Tim's absence kept coming back again and again and he was bound to admit his feelings went further that he himself thought possible. The round innocent face, the prominent green eyes that blazed with intelligence and comfort never left his mind all the way the drive to his home; the empty home once again.

Arriving there, late at night much later that the 21:00 he had said to his friend, he found Ducky waiting for him. This man never let anything fall down even when he knew he was driving others crazy. Gibbs sighed.

'Hello, Jethro.'

'Hello, Ducky. Isn't it a bit late for a nightly rendezvous all things considered?'

'Well, it is a bit late, but I was informed about your case, so I thought it would be for the best to feed you because on your own you would just drink yourself to stupor and be in your basement for the rest of the night…'

'Either way, it's our day off tomorrow, so what the big problem would it be?' In the meantime he opened his front door and ushered the older man inside. He didn't want to talk, he wanted to rest and have a clear head as to go and talk with his –much- younger lover in the morning, casting off any illusions said man had and bringing him back home, for a nice relaxed evening and hopefully night as well.

But Ducky wasn't just going to disappear, no matter how much Jethro wanted it, so half an hour later both men were sitting at Jethro's basement eating the Chinese Ducky had brought.

'Why did Timothy leave?' _Yes, Ducky. Really subtle way of accusing me for his departure.  
_  
'He had no reason other that the one he said; a better job and more money. What else do you want?' That angered him more and took him back to the stage of blaming Tim and wondering why they weren't enough for the younger man, why wasn't he enough for Tim to forget other dreams about his professional life? And since when did Tim have other dreams that didn't consist of Jethro and NCIS?

'Jethro, the man at the office today, was not our Timothy! You certainly noticed that.' Yes he had noticed it, but Tim hadn't permitted him to give any kind of comfort or the time to make any questions. '…and I don't think that it was the aftershock of his injuries.' The younger man, who had been fascinated by his own basement floor for as long as Ducky and he talked, looked the doctor hard in the eyes.

'What injuries? How do you know about his injuries?' _Did everyone know about Tim being in an accident except himself?_ Ducky knew he had to be careful if he wanted Jethro to finally tell him what was going on, and not reveal what Tim had trusted him with. He sighed and went for the final attempt; after all they were both really tired.

'What did you do Friday afternoon, Jethro?'

_He had spent his evening drinking like a sponge because it never affected him in any way while waiting patiently for the two days to pass and his lover to return. Oh and in the meantime he had pinned Abby in his wall kissing the living daylights of her in a drunken haste and loneliness. But, Tim couldn't know, could he now?  
_  
'Ducky I am tired. Maybe we could continue this nice little conversation tomorrow with cleared head, OK?' The Scottish wanted to decline and finish this charade the soonest possible but he could see his friend was in emotional agony, soothing Jethro himself hadn't realised yet. He got up and with a slight pat on the shoulder he left.

'Don't get up, Jethro, I can find my own way out. Just think about your life and what… or who makes it whole and make some decisions. Time isn't getting back and when you have something you need to fight to keep it.' He smiled at Jethro's shocked expression. 'We'll talk tomorrow. Have some rest. Goodnight.'

'Goodnight, Duck.'

When Ducky left he tried once again to call Tim but for the 23rd time he was beyond reach.

Lying in his bed many hours after his dinner, he tried to remember when his feelings towards Tim had changed and then once again how he hadn't realised how deep the pain would have been if he lost him. But what was the precise moment when McGee had stopped being just a member of his team, as important as the others, but still a member to become the object of his thoughts and fantasies?

He would say it all happened after his return from Mexico. The younger man had showed such happiness when he saw him back when Gibbs himself could only stare at the major changes at the younger man's body. Oh who was he kidding, he already had noticed the prospect of Tim since the first time he had laid his eyes on the clumsy round faced, innocent looking –and after closer investigation being as well- young man, slightly out of his teenage years with the brilliant mind and the thirst to learn everything.

Gibbs had managed to keep his thoughts to himself for a long time watching his youngest agent evolving and when he came back to see him shaped in a rather attractive lean "package" keeping all other vantages and virtues of his personality his job became even more difficult of keeping his hands to himself. And he did for a while; but the Devil's there to put the strongest of men on temptation and what better than the excuse of a case?

Gibbs got up from his bed and walked to the living room taking a bottle of water with him; he had enough whiskey in his system. He sat on the couch, the same one he had spent so many evenings with Tim in his side and thought about the case that brought him and Tim together.

tbc


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 **

_Flashback  
7 months ago_

Gibbs has to be given some credit; he had managed to keep his thoughts to himself for a long time watching his youngest agent becoming a better agent and being transformed from a boy to a man of his full potential. But, Devil is there to put the strongest of men to temptation and what better way than in the excuse of a case.

A homosexual Petty Officer by the name of Malcolm Crest was found brutally murdered in his house with evidence of earlier torturing. Ducky had declared cause of death the loss of blood. The body was covered in bruises and scratches and written on the wall in blood was a very derogatory expression about homosexuals. That, on itself made Gibbs and his team to make a little investigation about Crest's private life. It was found that he preferred the company of men than that of women and spent many evenings in one of the most well known clubs in his area.

Gibbs had sent DiNozzo and David to make the investigation, ask question, find possible witnesses, his friends and acquaintances, learn about secrets the Petty officer could have, and look for suspects at the club. So when the time came for an undercover assignment Tony wasn't qualified for it. Who was? Well, the remaining male members of Gibbs' team; Jethro Gibbs himself and Tim McGee. The supervisor of the team wasn't a happy camper no more than the younger man.

'McGee! With me!' Gibbs barked in a pointless effort to both look menacing and compose himself. It wasn't all that easy, if you wanted to admit it to himself. He and Tim alone, in a bar, pretending they were lovers. Oh great! Just great. OK, OK just sit back and enjoy the ride. He turned around to look the younger man and the vision was well… Poor Tim was looking back and forth between Jethro, Tony and Ziva as if waiting for someone to explain to him what he had gotten himself into, or for him to magically understand what he or rather they were about to do. Gibbs was seething and DiNozzo's teasing and knowing smiles weren't helping the situation at all.

'Um… Boss? What? What's going on? Wh… What will we do?' His wide, huge, green eyes had settled on Gibbs looking at him with trust and confusion. Truth was Gibbs couldn't stand that absolute look of respect at the young, childlike face. It made him feel guilty for some reason.

'Come! I'll explain on the road.' Gibbs heading to the elevator with Tim in tow, he slapped Tony in the head.

'But Boss…?'

'Shut up DiNozzo. You're making this even more difficult.' Ziva smiled as she watched their interaction. Tim's face remained dispassionate thinking all the possible outcomes for this late night adventure. He didn't know what was going on and Tim being Tim didn't like that feeling.

Inside the elevator Gibbs made a show out of checking Tim, he looked at him from head to toe appraisingly; hair was decent, it only needed a little touch, but he left that for the ending in case Tim wouldn't let him touch him if he continued with his plan. He was wearing a pair of black slacks, too tight for his own good but it could be of great assistance to their assignment, a white dress shirt and a black suit jacket. Unfortunately he also wore a tie in some unfathomable colour, or at least a colour Gibbs didn't know and he had his coat draped on his right arm. The older man took a step closer towards the younger after stopping the elevator.

'We're going to pretend we're having an affair, as I'm sure you have realized by now.' Or not, judging by the bulging of the green eyes. Still Gibbs didn't actually care, so continued just as bluntly as he had started. 'Are you with me?'

Tim got paler, if that was possible, and yes it apparently was and he looked absolutely mortified. 'Um… Boss,… we… I can't do that..'

'And why is that McGee? It's just another job. And you're working undercover?' Was he trying to put butter on the kid's bread? Well, it wasn't working. 'Take off the tie.' He ordered in the old fashioned Gibbs way. Tim started pulling it off when he slumped back on the wall. He looked at his Boss with despair.

'I don't know how.' Gibbs wondered if Tim didn't know how to take off his tie or… ah yes. Well, that was answer enough about Jethro inner questioning about Tim's experience in same sex relationships. There wasn't any, but he had to ask if only for amusement purposes only.

He batted Tim's hands away and took off the kid's tie himself and went for the 'killing' question. 'Any homosexual experience that could be useful at the moment McGee and I need to be aware of?' He raised his eyebrow while waiting for an answer. If the situation wasn't so serious he would have been laughing but he restrained himself. It wasn't exactly a job requirement to be bisexual at NCIS. After all, Tim's shocked expression betrayed everything. Gibbs was standing awfully close to the taller man and he could say his presence was making Tim uncomfortable. But when had that stopped him before? Oh yes; never! A little more, one little step more and they would be touching each other.  
Now, where was his coffee? On the meantime Tim decided to answer.

'No, Boss!' What was the question again? Ah yes, McGee was 100% heterosexual. Jethro's face softened.

'OK, do you trust me?'

'Huh?' Tim's eloquence was famous throughout NCIS but sometimes the boy's over functioning brain just couldn't make contact with his tongue. Did he have to think about tongues at that moment? Hell, maybe it could be for the best if he just called this undercover assignment off. His mind was too busy thinking about McGee's tongue rather than some Petty Officer who couldn't protect himself. That last thought brought him crushing to reality.

Unfortunately work always came before Senior Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs' needs, that as of lately were solely focused on the young man's body currently trapped against the wall by Gibb's own body. Well, that's life and she's unfair (Author note: I used the personal pronoun 'she' rather than 'it' because I like it more like that). Gibb's wasn't a marine for nothing. This unhealthy obsession had to take a hike, if only for a little while, basically until the murderer was behind bars.

Gibbs drove to the bar trying to calm Tim who in turn was swearing at himself. It was only an undercover job; he only had to pretend he the Boss' lover and things could have been worse. Oh yes? How's that? In Gibb's place could have been Tony, the little annoying voice inside his said replied ridiculously happily. OK, right, apparently this situation could have been worse. And Tiim did trust Gibbs; he had just had to feel comfortable in the older man's presence which theoretically was easier said than done.

Meanwhile Jethro was talking. To whom? Tim could only guess.

'Um… Boss…? I.. I cannot say I was listening to you for the last…' he looked at his watch estimating the time. '…say… hm ten minutes?'

His Boss sighed and pulled the car in a stop before turning to his left to stare at McGee.

_End of flash back_

Gibbs got up from his couch, saw the time and feeling more tired than he had in ages he went to his bed where a dreamless sleep took him over. He mentally cursed himself for washing the sheets after Tim had left for LA. The smell was fresh but it wasn't Tim's.

* * *

Tim saw the sun coming out; he always loved the sunrise and despite London's clouds the sun that day had managed to show off a little. Tim was more tired than he was the night before after a long series of pitiful attempts of writing and forgetting Jethro he realized that sleep wasn't for him. His body still ached from the accident and his heart wasn't listening to his brain. It just made aware to its owner that maybe he was wrong; maybe there was an explanation. But Tim's strong asset was always his brain or so that's what others liked to believe.

tbc


End file.
